Breakups are most of the time challenging, and you will go through many different phases to adapt to your newfound singlehood.
This article aims to discuss psychological facts about breakups. It will help you understand what happens during breakups and know what to expect if you, a close friend, or a relative are going through one.
In fact, having a grasp of the psychological facts about breakups will also increase your readiness in your future or current relationship.
That is to say, if you are thinking about a breakup, these facts will surely help since nothing will take you by surprise.
Hopefully, this article will allow you will fare much better if a breakup happens to you.
32 Psychological Facts About Breakups
Fact #1: People Have Doubts About Breaking Up Until They Do
You often won’t be certain of breaking up before it happens. It takes a while for anybody to be sure that this is the best solution, and most of us will believe there is still a way to work things out.
In fact, most breakups take a long while, and they’re hardly ever clear-cut. But still, there’s no perfect time to do it.
No matter who is right or wrong, the breakup will feel like the right decision if the relationship has truly come to its upper limit.
You might still experience doubts about your or your partner’s choice, but you will eventually see that you were not made for each other, at least not for the time being.
Fact #2: The Reasons Are Alike For Men and Women, Expect For Cheating
The reasons for breakups are essentially the same, like feeling that you’re not the priority, that you’re not loved the way you deserve, or simply that you don’t see a future together.
Still, women initiate breakups more often than men do.
When the reason for the breakup is due to specific events, such as cheating, then the reasons for men and women will vary. Men are more likely to break up if their lover cheats on them sexually or emotionally.
However, women are more likely to break up if they were cheated on emotionally, in the sense of having feelings for the other woman.
To be clear, neither men nor women are okay with cheating, and many women will break up after purely sexual infidelity.
However, according to evolutionary psychology, men would break up because it would be a direct threat to their genetic fitness, whereas, for women, it would be because it imposes a threat on the safety and stability of the family that the couple will eventually build.
Fact #3: Coping Is Different For Men And Woman
The main difference between men and women is how they cope when it comes to breakups.
Although both will suffer, research suggests that even though women are mostly hurt in the initial phases of the breakup, men have higher post-breakup stress and take longer to heal after splitting up.
As such, women move on more easily than men, as they feel less angry and vengeful.
For instance, men’s self-esteem is strongly negatively impacted after a breakup, and it takes quite a bit of time to recover from such a depletion.
On top of that, women will seek social support and embrace their feelings more than men do. In a sense, women tend to cope more adaptively with breakups than men do.
Fact #4: We Are Psychologically Wired To Avoid Losses
One universal fact about human beings is that we are more strongly motivated to avoid losses than to pursue gains.
The Prospect Theory of Daniel Kahneman supports this hypothesis, and it seems that it plays a role in making breakups feel more significant than any good news we might receive throughout the healing process.
However, even if we’re wired this way, becoming aware of this phenomenon opens up the ability to steer away from negative thinking and start embracing the positive events in our lives more intensely.
As a matter of fact, such loss-oriented thinking can be a relevant maintaining factor for feeling low.
Fact #5: You Will Recall Good Memories After Breaking Up
One psychological phenomenon that will accentuate the significance of being at a loss is remembering our good memories with our ex-partner.
Quite paradoxically, breakups happen because the bad outweighs the good, but it is only after splitting up that we realize all the good we’ve had with that person.
It is easy to be fooled by this process, however. In fact, it will make your healing more painful and lead to regrets and doubts about the breakup.
There is a balance to be found: thankfully, you have good memories with the person who played a significant part in your life, so it was not all in vain.
But still, bad things inevitably happened too. Even though seeing both sides of the coin at the same time is difficult, it will truly help you move on.
Fact #6: Moving On Is Similar To Overcoming Addiction
Moving on after a breakup is…
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