Conflict is something all couples fear. That’s because people don’t know how to handle arguments, which usually blow up in their faces. But conflict avoidance is unhealthy for the relationship. Two people won’t be able to see eye to eye on all topics. Disagreements are just a normal part of life. If you want to have relationships, even spiritual ones, you need to accept that you’ll disagree from time to time.
Conflicts can even be healthy for a couple. They can help you understand each other better, thus strengthening your relationship. Even though you might not agree after solving the conflict, at least you know where the other is coming from. For example, pizza doesn’t need to be both of your favorite food. But you must understand that your partner might even if you don’t like it. So, having a pizza night might make their week.
This give-and-take shows that relationships are about compromise, not finding the person you’ll never have arguments with. But some people don’t see things that way. They think eliminating conflicts is the only way to have a good relationship. But that’s not possible, nor is it desirable. What this leads to is conflict avoidance. This is an issue in more relationships than it might seem.
You might have even experienced it or are doing it in your current relationship. In that case, don’t be surprised if the problems keep resurfacing. If arguments remain unresolved, they’ll keep getting worse. Fortunately, there’s never too late to start learning how to resolve differences between you and who you love.
4 Reasons Conflict Avoidance Harms Relationships
1 – Conflict Avoidance Hinders Communication
Maybe you think avoiding conflict is the best way to solve issues, but it creates more. For one, it makes it that much harder to communicate with your partner. And that can seem like a small price to pay at first. But that will keep building up until there’s a wall between you.
Communication is an essential factor in all relationships. And it’s even more important to be able to communicate about the bad stuff. The good thing is always easy to talk about. Having fun together, bantering, and cracking jokes, comes naturally. But it’s harder to talk about deep stuff, especially about differences.
If you want a healthy relationship, you should be able to talk about everything. If you avoid conflicts, the issues will keep building up. You won’t have the energy to comb through all of them at some point. You won’t be used to communicating efficiently. Your conflicts will become full-blown fights that will probably destroy your relationship.
2 – Conflict Avoidance Makes You Afraid
Conflict avoidance is a form of people-pleasing usually born out of fear. It can appear in all areas of your life, not just in romantic relationships. For example, if someone takes credit for your work and you shrug it off, that’s a sign of fear. You are afraid to stand up for yourself and what’s yours, so you sacrifice everything for perceived peace.
That’s also how it can work when you avoid conflict in relationships. At first, you might think you are just avoiding a fight. That the moment of tension will dissipate, and everything will be fine. But after a while, that can change. Have you ever noticed that the more you put off doing something, the more anxious you become? The thought of finally doing that thing is an enormous weight pushing down on you.
That’s what happens when you constantly …
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