Long-distance relationships are not easy, but they can be fruitful. They require a lot of work from both partners, extensive and effective time dedicated to communication, and an unwavering commitment to make it through.
This article is here to present you with 16 psychological facts about long-distance relationships.
Most of the time, two lovers do not decide to create a long-distance relationship.
They often don’t have a choice and love each other too much to say goodbye when geographical constraints are imposed upon them.
On a comforting note, long-distance can be just as good as when you’re near.
Yet, the psychological effects of long distances should not be underestimated. It is good to be prepared if you’re in such a relationship or getting ready for it.
The best way to do so is to know the psychological consequences of long-distance relationships.
Knowing certainly helps, as potential hardships will not take you by surprise.
This article aims to do just that by presenting – psychological facts about long-distance relationships to make you aware of what might happen and to help you develop a proper mindset for it.
Psychological Facts About Long Distance Relationships
Fact #1: You Will Be Scared
One of the main fears that might occur during long-distance happens when we see that our partner is out there enjoying life without us.
Most of the time, this happens through posts on social media. Sometimes, we may be left with a feeling that we’re being left out and that things are passing us by.
Psychologists call this phenomenon the Fear of Missing Out.
The fear of missing out is normal, especially if we are used to doing most of our activities with our significant other.
But since we cannot expect them (or ourselves) to stop going out and enjoying what life has to offer, we will probably be confronted with this phenomenon at least once during the time spent apart from each other.
The main way to cope with such a fear is simply to face it with mindfulness and acceptance. The situation cannot be changed, and your partner probably experiences the same things.
Although the anxiety of missing out on events going on in their lives might be inevitable, our responses remain malleable, and that should be the sole focus.
Fact #2: You Will be More Stressed
Being apart from your loved one is certainly a stressful experience. The separation anxiety intrinsically tied to our human psychology manifests itself in all its colors, which is clearly not enjoyable.
Nonetheless, this is to be normalized, because our romantic partner is a figure of attachment that we hold very dear to our hearts.
In fact, our brains experience a surge of stress hormones, such as cortisol and adrenaline, whenever we spend prolonged periods of time away from our partners.
Feeling tense and stressed can be seen as a consequence of changes occurring in brain-wide neurochemistry, and this effect is common to all human beings.
Thus, in the first few weeks or months of the relationship, you might feel more tense than usual when talking to your lover.
You might feel your heart beat faster as you hear their voice on the phone and feel a little apprehensive about reconnecting with them.
Undoubtedly, being more on edge comes with more potential conflicts and arguments, and you should mentally prepare for that.
However, you shouldn’t expect this to last forever. It will eventually subside as you both get used to the new normal of the relationship. But at the same time, waiting it out is not the answer.
You should actively foster patience and motivate yourself to work out your conflicts when they emerge. With time and effort, stress will make space for peace, and trusting the process is a must.
Fact #3: You Might Feel More Lonely
It is to be expected: with your partner far from you, you might feel more lonely than they were around. This effect also has a neuroscientific explanation.
Indeed, as we move away from our partner, our brains experience dips in three neurotransmitters: phenylethylamine, oxytocin, and dopamine.
These three neurochemicals were high thanks to the physical closeness and sexual intimacy with our partner (oxytocin and dopamine) and the affectionate moments that contributed to building the love we feel for them (phenylethylamine).
Nonetheless, this depletion of brain hormones can be compensated when taking time to video chat for a relatively long period. Thus, this effect is reversible with proper efforts.
However, love cannot be reduced to hormones in the brain. The void our partners left in our lives should also be filled by new relationships or deepening existing ones.
In fact, we have more time to spend with our friends or to invest in making new friendships.
Whatever you may choose, something should be done to tackle…
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